You’re Going to be the World’s Best Icarus

(Picture taken from wikipedia.com)

The crows are wounded, but I have told myself that I wanted to kill them from my head. Everything was fucked up at the places that I thought was home. Maybe I am in love with the world for I have been a Valkyrie, in front of your eyes, in front of my heart. But maybe the world I live in is also what has thrown me away from the north to the sea. Nevertheless, I am happy that I have spread my wings strong as both an Icarus and a Valkyrie. I should throw away everything that screams here in my head  —   I should be overexposed. I don’t think that the world has always been headwind and chaotic. Humans are chaotic. But we need humans. You may think, “do people really have no heart?” “the voices in my head. I can’t make them shut up”. And maybe, everyone at home is sad knowing that you’d never come home. But worry not, maybe your home is somewhere else in a parallel universe. You have been wounded repeatedly, and your Freyja was not there to save you. Your wings were being torn  —  little do they know, that you are the best Icarus in the world. Maybe humans actually have no heart  —  have they ever thought, what if they were you? You had nowhere to run to, so you planted seeds, for you wanted to see small parts of your heart grow. The core seeds are an open wound, and you are buried deep in the sea. But your histories will be a legacy, and your seeds will be engraved in people’s paintings. You have always wanted to see the northern lights, but your heart itself shines northern lights. You are going to be the world’s best Icarus, I am sure. You are going to be the best in Midgard, or even in Westeros. And one day you will wake up glad that the world isn’t as cruel as you thought.

Kråkene er skadet, men jeg har fortalt meg selv at jeg ville å drepe de fra hodet mitt. Alt er føkt opp på stedene som jeg trodde var hjem. Kanskje jeg er forelsket i verden for jeg har vært en Valkyrje, foran øynene dine, foran hjertet mitt. Men kanskje verden jeg bor i er også det som har kastet meg bort fra nord, til havet. Likevel er jeg lykkelig at jeg har spredt vingene mine sterke som begge en Icarus og en Valkyrje. Jeg skal kaste alle som skriker her i hodet mitt  —  jeg skal bli overeksponert. Jeg synes ikke at verden har alltid vært motvind og kaotisk. Mennesker er kaotisk. Men vi trenger mennesker. Du kanskje tror, “Har mennesker faktisk ingen hjerter?” “De lydene i hodet mitt, jeg kan ikke lag de hold kjeft”. Og kanskje, alle hjemme er trist å vite det du ville aldri komme hjem. Men fortvil ikke, kanskje er ditt hjem et annet sted i et parallelt univers. Du har blitt skadet gjentatte ganger, og din Frøya var ikke der til å redde deg. Vingene dine ble revet, lite vet de, at du er den beste Icarus i verden. Kanskje mennesker har faktisk ingen hjerter  —  har de noensinne tenkt, hva hvis de var deg? Du hadde ingen steder å løpe til, så du plantet frø, fordi du ønsket å se små deler av hjertet ditt vokse. Kjernefrøet er et åpent sår, og du er begravd dypt i sjøen. Men historiene dine vil være en arv, og frøene dine vil bli gravert på folks malerier. Du har alltid ønsket å se nordlyset, men hjertet ditt selv skinner nordlys. Du kommer til å være verdens beste Icarus, jeg er sikkert. Du kommer til å være den beste i Midgård, eller til og med i Westeros. Og en dag vil du våkne opp lykkelig for at verden ikke er så grusom som du trodde.

Ralka Skjerseth is a 1998-born German Studies undergraduate based in Jakarta (and sometimes Depok) who works as a freelance columnist and music journalist and has been doing it on-and-off since the age of 17. She has previously gotten her
works featured on several media such as Magdalene.co, Women’s Republic, Pure Grain Audio, Warning Magazine, and L’Éphémère Review. She believes in nothing else but the revolutionary kind of good and the god within herself. Often found crying over Title Fight songs under the influence of booze when not revolting.

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